Tuesday, November 30, 2004
went to kbox this afternoon. first-timer.
man :"please take a seat first."
man came in after 15mins with drinks and was about to go.
us :"hey,why aint you helping us with the set-ups and all.and where's the book with lyrics?"
man :"oh you can start anytime." takes the remote control. "we're more high-tech now. no books whatsoever."
so there. the first-timers to kbox.
*makes faces*
star :"if he keeps hurting you why dont you just leave him?"
me :"star, will you ever leave your sky?"
i really ought to do some thinking.
i really didnt know there was squash training today.
serious.
take me with you
2:06 PM
Sunday, November 28, 2004
whats happening.
i dont know you anymore.
your love isnt as strong as it used to be.
its time to go.
you can never comprehend the pain that has been inflicted in me.
you gave me hope.
you coloured my life with memories of us.
moments when we were inseparable.
times when we only had eyes for each other.
i thought you were the one i've been waiting for.
the one who was here to stay.
but perhaps, its god's will.
all along, you were never meant to be mine.
its been my choice all along.
yet, i aint happy.
if only i could turn back time,
i wouldn't behave implusively.
i wouldn't be smitten over a jerk.
i wouldn't let you slip pass my life,
without a pause.
things could have been different...
take me with you
7:19 PM
Saturday, November 27, 2004
bored. did some quizzes...
Find out which Winnie the Pooh Character you are @ star-girl.org!
cant believe i've posted 4 posts today.
such a bad day.
-sighs-
take me with you
1:22 PM
i didnt know that...
wanting the best for you is wrong.
wanting you to be happy is wrong.
wanting to spend more time with you is wrong.
i thought you'd want to spend as much time as you can with me after your exams.
what i didnt think of is, i'm simply too naive and dumb to have such an illusion in mind.
guess i'm just a nobody to you.
can things be the same again? perhaps, it doesnt even matter to you whether its the same or not.
you told me to have faith in you. but...can i? *sigh*
i'm not supposed to wonder
where you are or what you do.
i'm sorry i cant help myself
cos' i'm in love with you.
i'm not supposed to love you.
i'm not supposed to care.
i'm not supposed to live my life
wishing you were there.
take me with you
9:21 AM
Friday, November 26, 2004
sorry.
didnt know my existance has brought so much pain to people around me.
totally unaware of what they've gone through and done for me.
i guess things are never meant to be.
sorry.
there're really many things which i dont understand and perhaps, never will.
take me with you
5:32 PM
you just dont understand.
are you the dumb one. or me?
i'm tried...
take me with you
4:08 PM
Thursday, November 25, 2004
received 10 bucks just by doing a survey? woohoo!...cool eh. hahahaha.
was kind of sad this afternoon. but after sleeping and...all...i'm ok now. geez. my 2.4 timings havent been consistent. sian1/2. kind of alternates. boooooo...
there're certain things that part of me dont wish to say. whats holding me back. dumbo`~
kbox outing is postponed to next week. *makes faces*
onlookers see best? is it? to a certain extent only i believe.
take me with you
2:06 PM
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
everything's different now.
i want the same old you back.
i'm still longing for you. but, its the one i used to know.
good-bye.
take me with you
3:28 PM
shark tale is so cute!..haha..ya watched that just now. movie and lunch was on shannon.someone's rich!..haha and he seriously needs more fats and he knows that.haha.
went to do some math later at tampines library.lazy shannon.spent so much time drawing and lazing and...whatever...anything besides doing work.lol.poor fella lives in bishan.haha.
at tuition just now,there was this tj guy.damn funny lah.he asked alot of questions and sometimes had this super blur look on him.haha.very funny.even his friend laughed at him.geez
yaya i know A's is ending.so what.doesnt concern me.at all.zzz`~wait till its this time...next year -.-
had a dream last night. the feeling of that dream woke me. but i couldnt be bothered.lol...will it really be ok soon?does it matter to me?hmm.if not ok. no doubt there'll be pain inflicted but it wont be to such a great extend.everything's expected.to me.whatever`~
what a cold day. woooo...
oh and my dear ade,i really dont think him and i will get together haha. you and your fantasies. lol. you raised this same topic last year. lol. its been a year...not possible. and see you on thurs! wee!..
take me with you
2:44 PM
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
wasted around 6 eggs today! haha because i failed to make half-boiled eggs.how on earth is it supposed to be done!grump.
hmm. caught taxi today! haha its an awsome show! love it. i actually brust out laughing. whaha`~ finally caught a nice show. and i realised, i've watched almost all movies except shutter. oopz. => geez!...slacked around orchard later on. saw some 301 mjcians doing some charity stuff. kept asking me to donate. boom.
hs called just now.hah.and we talked.hee.cant wait to go to the chalet!wee!...hope justin does a neat job.hah.
realised my current class is simply pathetic, to a certain extend.haha.i mean, i cant believe there're such people. shant elaborate and exploit the use of a blog.lol.anyway, my world doesnt welcome those kind of people! (for once, i'm being uncouth but its that horrendous ok boo.) im happier this way!weee!..
alan forgot to inform me that there wasnt any tuition today! AGAIN ok. -pissed- but anyway, spent 1.5hrs rotting and gossiping there. hee. he was super kpo lar ok. haha. and he's so many hamsters packed into a cardboard. haha. so cute!... took some funny photos of him using his hp. lol. he was really amused by my hp. diaoz`~ he hadnt seen that before.lol.and he isnt proud that he was from vj.lol.weirdo..
hmm.feeling guilty about not studying and doing my work these past few days. in some ways, panicky as well.grumpz.i'll start soon ok.zzz.but when?hah.soon.ok.soon.
got squash tomorrow!...arghz`~
why am i explaining things to you. gross. why should i? oh come on, i know what i'm doing. please take a look at yourself instead and quit bugging me. i despise people who say untruth craps about me. get a life. you want attention? thats not the way.
take me with you
1:25 PM
Monday, November 22, 2004
hmm.
its an utter waste of energy on people like that.
besides, hatred makes life miserable. so why should i make my life difficult because of an ass like that.
*grinz*
i'm feeling chirpy again.geez.
take me with you
1:01 PM
liars ought to be shot.
you're making me hate you =) and i really mean it.
ohh.
and mosquitoes are irritating.
take me with you
9:34 AM
Saturday, November 20, 2004
grr. gotta run 2.4km every squash training!..and then go gym.sian can.Zzz`~ having a friendly match against njc soon. ok. doom. whaha.. jeremy gave me his entire chemistry notes he did himself. how nice right.hee.today's lesson was extended!the chem la. the lecturer wanted to complete the entire tutorial so instead of having the supposedly 1 period, we'd chem for 2periods!and the best thing is there's a lecture test next year on all j1 topics covered this year on chem for those who got o or f for promos.great. -_-! oh ya! and i went to "test" 4 indian ventors' food today. we were supposed to recommend 1 stall which will be opened next year in mj! weee... actually the food wasnt that great but i aint that particular. hee.
hmm. shared a bowl of meepok with angela today.hmm. it was horrible.i mean the meepok. haha . anyway, she told me that according to yvonne, yanqi ( zj's classmate ) and her girl friends think that it was rather funny when zj and i got together. apparently they think that zj isnt that gd looking and that i should have a more gd looking boyfriend. hmm after hearing that, not much feeling. haha. and that zj forced me to spill everything out about the looks differentiation. it kind of pissed me off because i despise being forced! damn. anyway, he doesnt really mind as in, he totally agrees.
actually there were occasions when i found him handsome. haha. dont know why. yvonne thinks he's unattractive and all. but what really matters is how i feel about it. right?hee.
was feeling depressed last night. sigh. first time in so many weeks ok. i so wanted to let him know. but i didnt want to appear soft and vulnerable in front of him. with that in mind, i held myself back. went to school with miniatured eyes.hmm.get it?sian1/2. -_- anyway i'm fine now. totally`~ yawnz.
boredd`~
forgot to add something. shannon teo was very rude today! he said "bye la" to me!.. Grr!!..
take me with you
2:20 PM
Friday, November 19, 2004
ok when to wild wild wet today! geez. it didnt rain!... anyway, the place there is so pathetic can! only 5-6 nice rides. and the worst thing is, the time taken to quene for a single ride is actually don know how many times that of a single enjoyable ride! in short, not really fun. =\ but i love the wave pool! urm dont know what you call that but, yea that was cool man! man-made waves! weee!... my peeling is worsening. grumpz...
hmm. he's slowing slipping out of my life. good-bye.
i'm sick. grumpz.
take me with you
1:18 PM
Thursday, November 18, 2004
boo~!got scolded by coach.off form.too tired.zzz`~
got to know something. it hurts tremendously when the person you love actually hates you. so much so that you dont even have the guts to get that person a birthday card. kinda sucks right. sigh...
i love ice-cream! yummm...
take me with you
2:25 PM
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
-yawn- its a holiday today! slacked the whole day at home the whole afternoon. was woken up early by my little cousin! she kept screaming! grrr...but she's cute nonetheless. hee. managed to get some work done though. hee. headed to parkway later and bought a slipper and a skirt both from op! yay!...hmm think i'll get the shoes at the end of december and as for the sunglasses, hmm probably soon yea. hee. those who have absolutely no idea what i'm babbling about read my previous entry => hee...oh ya and i want a puma jacket!...not materialistic okay. because the ones i own, are pretty useless in keeping me warm. whaha`~ thinned-skin. what to do. bleah.
anyway, there wasnt any tuition today!...felt cheated. haha. that alan lar! he was my physics tutor last year and owns a tuition centre at marine parade. back to him, he didnt inform me! again. thank god my parents were still at paraway parade. anyway, there werent any classes on but there were some jc guys there asking alan for help on physics. haha. poor alan. complained that today's a public holiday but...still got to help out. haha`~ though the guys there werent really cute but presentable yea. hee. they even asked whether i was taking my o's this year. zZz`~ while i was talking to alan, i heard them asking a guy what school i'm from. haha. they didnt ask me!...so of course i didnt bother answering. lol.
my class wants to go sentosa. again. but they've to wait till i stop peeling. haha.
have to run 2.4 tomorrow!...-damn- zZ`~ yawn* anyway i could just fake any timing. because we're supposed to run when we've the time. but im honest and a person of integrity. so...of course i wont cheat. whahaha`~ serious!... haha... okok... really! honest! hee....
eliz scribbles
take me with you
12:39 PM
Monday, November 15, 2004
weee!..celebrated vanessa's birthday today. went to play pool the whole afternoon at yisi's uncle's shop. hee. in the past i dreaded playing pool but after today, i guess im ok with it now. hee. walked back to city hall along singapore river then went to orchard. haha. yvonne kept commenting that i looked very guai today. haha. i mean, thats what i always am. right?? hee....
took some photos today! geez!...then went to pierce my left ear. wanted to pierce the 4th hole on my right but afraid it'd pierced into my bone. and according to sandy, it will hurt a great deal so to play safe, i didnt. => yvonne pierced only her left ear. so paikia right? haha. zZz`~
walked around orchard and it looks so festive with the lightening decorations and all. hee. so many people today!...was like...Zzz`~ hee. and of course, so many cute guys today! whahaha`~ anyway, today was nice! very nice! angela and i kept laughing like mad...her pronounciation and all...hahaha...weee!... =>
oh ya, yvonne and gang saw sly today at city hall haha. and she was backstabbing him while he walked pass. whahaha`~ so fun. according to her, he was with a female friend and apparently nobody was bothered about his appearance...except for sandy who pointed at him and shouted his name! hee.... => if i reached there early just now, i'd have seen him too! -damn- lol. oh, and my mum thinks sly is cute. heh!..
hmm. i want an op skirt. sunglasses. new shoes. slippers. new bag. materialistic? you've got it wrong! totally!..
op skirt-i dont have one
sunglasses-i dont have one either
new shoes-its for squash.
slippers-2 of mine are spoilt
new bag-for the coming year.
see?! not materialistic okay. bleah.
take me with you
3:53 PM
Sunday, November 14, 2004
yay finally went swimming today! hee. my face is pink-er now ok! haha. but my shoulders are starting to peel now. argh`~
went to suntec with leo to watch a lindy hop competition but there were only 3 contestants! so in the end we went to watch princess diaries 2. guess what...its definitely better...much better than "the forgotten"! haha. its really like in a fairytale! gosh. everything there were exquisite. but i find it rather pointless to have those things. i mean, there're not necessities. i doubt i'd have any form of pleasure or satisfaction when i use those items. *grinz* and i met chiuyan! whaha`~ so shocked ok. really missed her so much that i kept hitting her. hee.
went to some place somewhat like cafe cartel. and please, i dont eat that slow! hee. leo really has thick thick eyebrows. whaha. and he was damn generous la. told the person to keep 6 bucks + worth of change. haha. richy rich. gee and thanks for the compliment that i've a sweet smile. whahaha`~ and i dont look somewhat like a japanese can! leo looks like some korean or jap guy because of his thick-ish eyebrows. if he were to trim it or what, he's gonna suffer like hell. whaha. and i dont think the eyebrow stylist or whatever knows where to start from. haha. too thick =p hee.
watch summer scent! channel U @ 11pm. min yu broke huiyuan's heart. sob. guys. sighh`~ dad's working till dawn. sian1/2...
-peeling mode- had an awsome day today! weeee!...
take me with you
2:35 PM
Saturday, November 13, 2004
ahhh!...how i wished i could be jingwen!...kaiwei and her are just the perfect couple! *envious mode now* hee. by the way im referring to the show "the champion" hah. grrr...squash training was terribly tiring! my timing for 2.4 today had deteriorated! oh man! and have to run 2.4 next week for 3 times! grumpz. jenny was utterly disappointed when we didnt want to join the national squash championship competition. sighh...but i really dont want to join! zZz`~ and camel actually apologised to me just now for disturbing me during squash training. haha! aiyah...but i'm always under his disturbance!..grumpz!
been having a spliting headache zZz`~
i ought to start on my work...As Soon As Possible! =p
why am i feeling this way? i mean, few months back, i'd have been one nonsensical, unreasonable, paranoid moron. but now...i'm actually feeling this way!...well, there're 4 possibilities:
1) i dont care anymore
2) i've become more understanding
3) i'm hiding my feelings and lying to myself
4) i've become totally numb to it
i dread it when i cannot even understand myself... =( life's really...unpredictable haha`~
i love reading!...because besides sleeping, its the only time i can get away from reality and diffuse into a world of fantasy and creation. hee.
eliz scribbles...
take me with you
2:17 PM
Friday, November 12, 2004
geez!wanted to go swimming this morning but woke up at 11+ hee. zZz`~ watched the forgotten at cine just now...lousy movie! didnt really understand it and was so crappy can! lousy story plot! argh`~ and today is my day manz haha. there were many cute guys at cine today! really cute. hee. they really make my day. whaha...
oh my and i think i'm falling head over heels for Qi Yu Wu! he's so...charming! has a nice body! and most importantly, he's so...woah! hmm. he's just soo perfect! hee. =>
hmm. life is definitely unpredictable. it makes me so scared to carry on. i mean, there're so many obstacles out there in life. yet, most of the time, you've to face it alone. people often say treasure the present...but how do you actually treasure it? time passes, people change...why cant things be still for once. i dont know how many obstacles i've to go through in life but i know...i've been through one of the toughest. i forced myself to forget, i put on a brave front everytime. my life was hell-ish for several months. it was really really tough for me. sighh`~ actually i ought to thank him. because of him, i'm able to face whatever problems i'm encountering or will be encountering...in a stronger manner now. hmm. he's really created an unforgettable impact. you know, sometimes i wonder...whether you can finish loving? its like...after giving all your love for this particular person, are you still able to love another person as much as you loved the previous one? is there still "enough" to love? zzZ`~ hah. sounds crappish. but i've ponder over this... -_-!! i contemplate alot...so weird`~ zZz...
squash training is really taking up alot of my time!..grumpz
take me with you
2:23 PM
Tuesday, November 09, 2004
hee.went to angela's house in the morning to prepare the food.had lots of fun la!haha...was damn tired though cos i slept at 1+ the previous night and woke up at 630! zZz`~ yawnz.hotdogs prepared by angela were squashed and looked like dog bones!haha...so out of shape can!..
we were supposed to meet melissa at harbourfront at 11am.but apparently, with all the waitings and whatever, we were an hr late!whaha`~went to sentosa!hee.and it didnt rain!...we were famished and started eating the moment we found a good spot hah!..played volleyball till my hands hurt!...then played a game where you've to throw that flat plate? ya...that game. lol. it was damn hot!...and i got red. hahaha. it was fun!..
we then swam across to the opposite land.haha.quite near lar.but was kind of scary nonetheless.hee.and on the way back, i got bitten twice by something!..argh. and i was swimming lo...made me so scared.heh.
went to ps later on for dinner.left me,angela,yuanfang,mingzhang and yunsheng.haha.very funny lar we ate the same thing and drank the same thing.lolx. slacked around at e-zone.it was damn quiet for an arcade lor.but yunsheng and mingzhang were damn noisy lar!..hee.after we left. -quietness- again. heh!..
think i stepped on something while running like mad and getting sand all over me just now. its stuck inside my right sole!..pain!..zZz`~
anyway, had tons of fun today!..hee..great! =>and i just uploaded some pics we took today! hee.check it out!..hee.
take me with you
2:23 PM
Sunday, November 07, 2004
yay caught "the incredibles" today at cine!..heh it was a premier and apparently there were many guests i suppose. cos there were quite a number of people waiting for god-knows-who to appear. hee. anyway, didnt manage to catch a glimpse of the s'pore idols top 4 contestants though they were supposed to be there. haha. we waited for damn long for the movie to start lor!..kept walking up and down. zZz`~ and leonard owes me one!!! gRrr..he's damn funny lar!..how can you possibly ask someone whether he/she is a male/female?! hah. thats...so offending lor. haha. but he thinks otherwise! he's full of his own logics lar!..grr..cannot even let me win once!..it was a nice day though. hee.
after much negotiating, my hair...looks...haha...ok i suppose. but thats only for TODAY! i guess it'll look like crap tomorrow. haha. zZz`~
-dont let anything get you down-
take me with you
2:55 PM
Saturday, November 06, 2004
my back hand for squash has finally improved! whaha`~ damn tiring today zZz.
hmm. someone who keeps hurting you. someone who doesnt really bother about your feelings. no matter how much u love this "someone"... is it still worth carrying on?
i dont exactly feel as terrible as i was last year. im numb i suppose. i mean, how much effort does it take to smash a not-onced-not-twiced-but-thriced shattered heart. haha. and guess i need a heart transplant soon...real soon. i dont even want to think about it anymore. i dont even mean anything to him. so...let it be.
take me with you
3:48 PM
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
Don't wanna close the door
Don't wanna give up on it
Don't wanna fight no more
We'll find a way around it
Where's the love we had
We can make it last
Tell me what I gotta be
Tell me what you want to do
'Cause I can't live my life
The way you want me to
You know I can't go on
Living like we do
Do I have to cry for you
Do I have to cry for you
So tell me what it's for
If there's no winner in it
Nobody's keeping score
Let's start from the beginning
Can we make it last
With the love we had
monkey's stressed. hope he does well.if he really wants to spend more time with his friends next mth,i'll let it be.though deep down i truly mind. i mean,who doesnt want her bf to spend more time with her. but at this point of time, i guess nothing really matters now so long as he's happy.his smile and laughter-thats all i want.so long as he's happy and wants it to be that way,i'll let it be.
think i've changed.normally i'd kick a fuss outta it.heh.i've really changed.moments spent next mth will definitely be very limited sighh`~but i hope to make e best outta it for him.
-off-
take me with you
2:48 PM
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
op sucks manz. the questions asked were like...out to kill us or something. damn`~ screwed it up argh!! anyway its over =>
i've done my part to salvage the gap thats widening between us and i've no regrets whatsoever. there's always no outcome and...i terribly need a break. this is totally draining me out. just where are you...
Have You Ever?
Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever
Have you ever
Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything
To make them understand
Have you ever had someone
Steal your heart away
You'd give anything, oh
To make them feel the same
Have you ever search for words
To get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start
Ooh Have you ever find someone
You dreamt of all your life
You'd do just about anything
To look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one
You've given your heart to
Only to find that one
Won't give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes
And dreamt that they were there
And all you can do is wait
For the day when they will care
Have you ever loved somebody
What do I gotta do to get you in my arms, baby
What do I gotta say to get to your heart
To make you understand
How I need you next to me
Gotta get you in my world
Cuz baby I can't sleep
take me with you
2:13 PM
Monday, November 01, 2004
its tough appearing strong when my heart yearns for you.
can i appear vulnerable...for once?
-distressed-
take me with you
1:42 PM
op tomorrow pray for me!!
just where are you...
-the only place i get to be with you is in my dreams-
take me with you
7:45 AM
